We got the official diagnosis of autism for Jonah yesterday, but really, it's been a long time coming. Since he is a twin, it's been easy to see, along the way, the subtle (and not-so-subtle) differences. The eye contact that was so much harder to get at 6 months. Spinning toys at 9 months. Failure to develop language at 12-18 months. Preference for playing alone that still persists. I really do think, though, that all of these symptoms are milder than they could be. I can tell you that, just from observing other children in the waiting room at speech therapy, we are lucky-lucky-lucky.
And of course, that's not the only way we are lucky. I couldn't be more proud of Jonah. Of who he is, of what he's accomplished. Today, when he wanted me to sing along with a song on the radio, he walked up to me and put his little fingers on my lips. Smiled like crazy when I obliged- no accounting for taste :) He has his own way of letting us know what he needs now, and it's such a pleasure to finally be able to do that. Also, he's darn cute, if I say so myself.
I cried for most of the day yesterday, but today what I feel most is relief. We waited so long to get the appointment with the pediatric neurologist, and we spent all that time questioning whether we were worried for no reason or (more likely) wasting valuable time. Honestly, I'm glad it's over and ready to just dive in and get him what he needs. What that is exactly is hard to say. There seems to be no road map, no concrete plan of action. It's probably impossible to have one with such a varied spectrum.
So, anchors aweigh.
Praying for your family! What a great mom...jumping in and preparing to do whatever it takes to help Jonah. You are both so blessed.
ReplyDeleteI sit here wondering what to type in this space--to say "I'm sorry" seems oddly inappropriate--after all, your Wonder Boy IS a Wonder Boy (and now I've got that Jack Black song in my head thankyouverymuch). Obviously I don't know the specific pain that you feel, but I do know what it's like to have your life go in a direction you never could have imagined, and I'm sorry for that part--that feeling of the rug pulled out from under you. But you do what you have to do--what you're already doing--digging in, fighting hard, never giving up, and following your heart. Thanks for allowing us on the journey.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what to say, other than I'm here to support you and read about your journey. I hope now that you know what you are dealing with you can feel some relief. xoxo
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful idea to create a blog which tracks your journey. Having watched my nephew in St Louis on his journey, I too think he is a wonder boy. He is now a young adult and has a wonderful, full and rich life. So much has been done in the field of autism but much, much more can be done. Your life will always be full of chanllenges, but God will never give you more than you can handle.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing and I look forward to following your journey with Jonah.
Michelle van der Goot (Germany)